It’s so hot…

There’re a ton of jokes out there about how hot it is. It’s so hot, the fire hydrants are chasing dogs. It’s so hot chickens are laying hardboiled eggs. It’s so hot I can’t be bothered to list another one. Round here we’re not telling jokes; laughing would generate too much bodyheat. So we’re just laying low. Waiting for the latest canicule to be over and done—make that “well done”—with. 

It’s so hot, the flies lord it over us. Food stays under cover from those nasty little feet. It’s so hot—staying with the insect theme—the vines are alive with buzzing and even green is a warm color. It’s so hot, one of my favorite beverages isn’t anymore.

HOT 6b

HOT 5b

HOT 7c

If you point your phone at the sun and “click,” the picture turns out like this. But in reality it’s just a blinding white. The world turns into a midday composition of black and white, where even the shadows are hot. Lawn chairs sit empty.

HOT 4b

HOT 11

HOT 2b

The only flowers that look “purty” are fake. (Though I gotta say, fake flowers have come a long way.) Gardening tools are on sabbatical. That includes the lawn mower, which sits parked, until further notice, in the head-high grass.

HOT 1b

HOT 3b

HOT 10b

And last but not least, there will be no more hot baths. The tub is nothing more than a wasteful, wrought-iron accessory, but don’t tell the French plumbers who heaved it up the stairs. (Come to think of it, that’s a pretty hot, sweaty and slightly butt-cracky tale…but we’ll save it for another day.)

HOT 8b


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12 Responses to It’s so hot…

  1. Debra Kolkka says:

    This is why I come back to Brisbane in June.

  2. You clever, clever girl…using the world as your personal air conditioning system! How I’d love winter in Australia just about now! Usually in France it’s coolish but right now, whew baby, it’s so hot my hot flashes seem cold.

  3. Gerlinde says:

    When we were in Paris it was so hot I wore my dress wet out of the wash machine. I love your photos. Have a cool weekend with a lot of available ice cubes!

    • It’s funny what we’ll do when we’re traveling. I think that make-it-up-as-you-go-along thing is so liberating, don’t you? I know you miss Paris…we are making ice cubes as fast as we can. It’s funny, here in Europe, we’ve never had a refrigerator that made them (and haven’t missed it), but right now, I’d give my left nut for an ice machine. If I had a left nut.

  4. God! You poor thing. The heat is only just reaching us, with its humidity.. And we LONG for summer!! I think of you often and hope all is well.. love love.. c

    • Hi Celi! I was thinking about you as I wrote. It seems we each get dealt such different cards. You are there with the rain rain rain. And mud mud mud. (Yes, I DO think about our book ALL THE TIME.) And I am here with the heat heat heat, bake bake bake. Oh well. You are wise enough to keep your eye trained on the beauty, in any case, so I’m gonna do the same. I think of you all the time, you know?

  5. dayphoto says:

    I ADORE that photo of the plants shadows on the earth!

    We were hot like that…it’s miserable. I hope a cooling rain heads in and helps things out!


  6. ron says:

    we took two showers each today, the second was cold, no hot water added at all. that was after we did some yard work. it’s so hot, just thinking about yard work makes me sweat like i just got out of a shower. and when it rains, the humidity that follows just makes the hot air chewier, thicker, muddier, harder to walk through. like trying to run in a swimming pool. it’s so hot….

  7. Chewier. That’s a good way to put it. We’re going through some of that here. Usually it all ends with a banging thunderstorm, but this time, really weirdly, it hasn’t happened. We keep getting little rain showers that, yes, just make things more humid. Today the farmers sowed manure into the fields and I am telling you the whole town smells like a, well, that. Odd mix with the humidity.

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